TimeSquirrel

I think I made something looking like this in Kerbal Space Program once.

This is how the retro computer community does it. Instead of trying to keep an aging 30-40 year old floppy or hard drive working, people make all kinds of interface adapters to convert it to be able to use SD and Compact Flash cards. It’s usually something like an AVR or PIC microcontroller that talks to the ancient computer on one end, and interfaces with the newer storage medium on the other, acting as a middleman.

I have a NES cart that does this with ROM files on an external card. As long as you make it speak the old protocol, you’ll fool the machine into thinking it’s using the same old equipment.

It’s hilarious when some of these old machines install OSes like Windows 3.11 in like two seconds with a solid state upgrade.

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You know what, a high tech futuristic implant would be cool. Imagine being able to get high just by thinking about it, and the implant stimulates your brain cells like THC or alcohol would, or make you think you’re playing on the beach tossing a beach ball with some dolphins while you’re at work grinding away. Or controlling vehicles like fighter jets with just your mind. You become the plane and can feel every air current across your wings, turning it into a precision flying machine able to thread canyon gaps all day.

But not anything from this asshole.

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Shit, I remember having to wipe my boss’s computer back in '03 because he clicked on an attachment called something along the lines of “bigtiddies.mpeg.exe” or some shit.

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Or use a browser that’s so featureless that exploits don’t have anything to exploit, such as Lynx. The rest should be handled by any decent firewall in front of it.

Well, if you manage to retrieve my old phone I accidentally dropped off a sailboat into the Chesapeake Bay in 2013 and somehow retrieve the flash chip’s contents, you can be semi-rich. There’s no password on the wallet. And I made no backups. I’m poor now due to my own stupidity.

It was created in a time when physical restrictions on access to the machine was enough. If you weren’t meant to be in the lab, somebody found out real quick.

Wasn’t just that, it was everything. DOS, early Windows, etc all didn’t give a rat’s ass about security. In 1986 you could just go over to your friends house and turn on their machine and just go through all their shit laid bare. I don’t even think we had BIOS passwords at the time. At least the machines I used didn’t. It was a wild time.

Marilyn Manson?

I program embedded devices. There’s not often just a ready to go library for what you want to do when you’re doing bare metal. You’re given a C compiler with the bare minimums, and that’s it. You’re expected to mostly build what you need by yourself. That includes file-parsing routines. A microcontroller doesn’t even have any idea what a filesystem is unless you build one. I gotta do all that myself with an SD card through low level SPI stuff.

On general purpose OSes, yes, you have a plethora of frameworks and libraries to choose from. In this world, the cool stuff, like C++ Boost libraries for example, doesn’t exist.

I use Debian btw

Can’t just have a basic system utility that does what it needs to and no more, like *nix OSes do. No, gotta bloat up and enshittify everything no matter how mundane. We didn’t need you to turn Paint into a half-ass shitty Photoshop, and we don’t need this either. That’s what a word processor is for.

That carriage return that Windows sneaks in there has been the source of a lot of file-parsing problems for me when I forgot to catch that in my programs, because I develop on Linux and I’m not expecting it.

It’s okay, in 75 years Japan’s government will still be keeping them alive. That’s why you can still buy floppy discs on Amazon.

Macroshit

It’s not necessary to change the name to make fun of them. We’ve been giggling at the name “Micro Soft” alone for 30 years.

Why not tackle this from the opposite end, where instead of removing things and potentially breaking stuff, you add what you need instead? Debian is what Mint and Ubuntu are based on, and you can install a very bare bones system from the start.

For every bleeding edge GPU and CPU, there are thousands of simpler ICs still in use. Microcontrollers, logic gates, opamps, etc. There’s no reason to produce those at the smallest feature size possible.

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