I just picture someone with a legitimate ear injury having to go to Walmart and getting praised and followed around like Brian from “Life of Brian”.

“No I’m not a Trump supporter, I just nicked my ear doing yard work! Stop following me! Go away! Leave me ALONE!”

Did you try looking in your search history?

The man wouldn’t last an hour minute working on an actual ranch.

I turn off my lights when I’m not in a room and don’t own a server farm. #doingmypart🌳

Summary: Houses expensive, mortgage rates suck. People no move, maybe this problem? Darn people not moving!

I guess I’m the problem for locking in a good interest rate when they were low and not wanting to fuck myself over by moving. Been a real problem for me though because I do want to change my job and really want to go to another state if I do.

Not feasible to do so because I live in such a low cost state. There is a huge financial gap now to overcome. It’s depressing because I’ll probably be stuck for years waiting this out.

All the other kids with the pumped-up kicks

Good, nothing is exclusive because of when you were born.

So… everytime I nut it’s like a microplastic glitter cannon?

🎉🎉🎉

Live in a slum lords apartment building. I like to pretend I’m in the woods after the leaves have fallen when I go get a glass of water in the dark.

Your mother makes robots in hell.

Scientists: “They big”

Welp better stop eating beans and farting for the rest of my life to help do my part and recoup the damages. All this world destroying pollution is my fault as a consumer, not the producers.

Very true, might be a mix of this and the other half of the table having an orgy.

That’s the stupidest combination I’ve ever heard in my life! That’s the kinda thing an idiot would have on his luggage!

And drinking a refreshing Ç̷̧̡̢̧̧̙͓̮̮͖͎̱̤̳̙̺͍̺̜͇̠̯̗̼̯͍̖͈̝͎͙͓̦̞̝͙̺̼̗̘̲̙̮̺̪̹̪̗͓͍̳̲̼͈̖͗͑̾̈́̓̀͗̈́͜͜͝͝ͅͅơ̸̧̡̢̧̢̨̛̛̛̙̟̦͓̜̯̖̬̩̙͚̭͚̱͓̫͖̙̮̪̗̜̗̻̬͖̝̖͉̩̻̺͇̲̩̦͍͚̝̐̾͆̾̃̓́͋͑̀͑́̆̌̒͂̍̎̊̂̓̆̔̀͗̉̄̍̒̎́̒͊͛͌̑̒̽̿̇̀̅̊̄͆̊̈̿̀̂̓̈́͌͛̃͑͑͊̚̚̚̕͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅk̶̢̨̢̛̛̛̮̻͕̱͙̰̬̟͕̝̪̮̥͎̪̻͇̣̼͚͍̲̪͙̗̹̱̺̆͑͐̈́͛̏̽͐̿́̈́͗̽̏̔̋͊̀̅̽́̀̿̓̉͐͊͊̐̍̆̎̍̀͒̋̈́̔̿̔́͑̽̔́͛̾̂͑̈́̔̈́͌̍̈̄͛̍͐͐̈́̃͌̄̋̈́́̌̓̉̇̿̀̀̚̚͘̚͜͜͜͜͠͝͠ę̶̡̛͚͓̲̼͈̭͚̙̼͕̮̙̫̖͓̜̣͕̠̞̫̗͙̥͚̣̣̲̫̜̟͔̯̫̩̼̤̅͒̌̍̑̀̇͂̄͗̀̊̄̅̔̔͗̂̾̉̓̐͗̋͗͊̀̏̇͛̊̏̃̌͌́̈͋̑̒͒̈͌̈́͑̂̈͋̎̑̓̊̀́̐̚̚͜͝͠͝͝͠͝a̸̢̡̢̧̧̤̜̰̠̩̯͙͔̖̳̳̩̘̥͙͙̙̬̦̺̗̝͛́̍̓̇́̀͆͑͜ć̴̡̨̧̛̖̱̥̙̳͓̤̻̑͐̅̑̏̐͊͒̾̎́͗̋̎̈́͐̌̇̓͆̓̒͐̔̄́̂̊͑̒̉͑͑͂́͛͋͒̊͋̓̓̀͂͒̎͋͋̎̽́͋̀̏͒̒̿̒̽̂̔̂̀̅͂̋͐̋̈̀̿̿́̍̕̚͝͝͠͝͠͝͝͝͠ơ̸̢̨̨̢̲͚̤͖͇̦̯͓͍̤͈̹̖̞͕̗̬̮͔͚͙͎̩̣͓̹͎͚͈̖̚͜l̴̨̢̧̡̢̢̢̡̨̢̧̛̺̳̭̘͙̬͙͖̬̲̠͔͈͎͇̠̼̘̗̭̤̥̖̭̻͎̱͈͓̲̺̬̫̤̻̙̮̬̯̻͖͇͔̹̩̟̰̣͙̫͎̤͔̼̩͙̬̖̟̪̤͇̟̫̭̳͙͈͇̮̞͕̰̮̙̪̳̟͈̿́͌̀̄̽͗̄̄̆͑̔͊̈̊͌̄͒͋̎̓͐͂̀͛̊͊̐͂̀̽̒̂̊̔̆̏̌̍͛̾̉̽̑̾̋̅͛̌̆̎͛͑̉͑̕̕̕̚͜͠͝͠å̸̧̧̨̨̛̛̛͍̖̗̲͙̝̜̲̪͖̟̬̱̜̜͚̳̻͉͎̪̩͎͈̟̻̫̟͖̲̤̜̥̮̝̗̳͖͕̻̞̙̳̤͚̹̳͍̭͔̤̼͍̬̼̌̒̔͂̈͆̆͒͂͌̄͗̌̆̉̀̉̽́͂̔̆͂̽̌̈́̏́̿͋͂̎́͛̑͛̐͗̋̑̀̃̀̇̎͛̊̇̆͊̏͗͂̋̒̎͛͆̅͑̀̿̎̉͊͑̍̚̚͘̕͘͘͜͠͠͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅ