Sure, but Blue No Matter Who started during the 2016 Democratic primary between Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders supporters. It encourages Democrats to come together and support the nominee in the general election, no matter who they backed in the primary. I use it to highlight the importance of coming together to stand against Republicans.
I was always going to vote against Trump, no matter who the other candidate was. I’m glad it’s Kamala, though. I think most people on Lemmy see the danger and made their decision long ago. Blue, no matter who.
Thanks, I agree, it’s always been abusive, even in the 90s. My grandparents were the ones pushing him to do it, though. I remember overhearing a conversation between one of my grandparents and my dad when he was taking me to an alternative school one day. He actually pushed back on them, saying he didn’t want to do it. I saw him cry once when I asked him why he does it. He had a worse childhood than I did. My grandpa used to call him “fruit” a lot. But yeah, he clearly had ADHD and didn’t know about it. He had this whole system where he would write down anything he didn’t want to forget and he’d just cross it off the list as he got around to it. I saw my name on the list and crossed out once, lol. He never threw punches or anything like that. He’d just grab a belt after work if I got into trouble at school that day. There were more good times than bad; that’s why I always lied to CPS for him. I loved my dad and still do. It’s one of those situations where his dad was really abusive, he was kind of abusive, and I’ve sworn to never be like either of them. I’ve been compared to some Chaotic Good characters, and this is where the “good” comes from, I think. I decided early on to try and do what’s right regardless of what other people think due to the dynamics between my father and his father.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell turned into “Don’t Ask, Don’t Harass” once Obama got into office. I thought that was pretty cool. The structure was the best thing for me, honestly. I’ve been trying to recreate some of that, but it’s been hard. Like just now, I went for a run around the neighborhood like I used to do right after getting out of the military. It’s kind of dumb, but this is my favorite cadence to run to. Your left foot is supposed to hit the ground when they clap. It helps you forget about running.
The burnout was due to being on-call while simultaneously being underpaid. I wasn’t allowed to really go anywhere because if I missed a call, then my backup would get called, and that always seemed to cause issues. I had to work all day, and my evenings were usually filled with emergencies too. Many nights I’d be stuck on a bridge for 6+ hours when I should have been asleep because some service went down and it was all hands on deck until service was restored. After my dad died, and right as the pandemic was starting, I quit my job and basically took an extended vacation for the next 8 months until I felt back to normal. The next job was a dream come true, but it was temporary because I was on a 12-month contract (the contract got renewed once, so it turned out to be a two-year gig). I had another job after that which wasn’t a good fit, but I’m fully committed to DevOps-type work. I’d love to be a manager though, maybe I’ll look into that. Anyway, I could never get burnt out from this type of work because it truly is my passion. I’m planning to get two jobs this time and work both of them simultaneously. It’s called Overemployed. I’ve also started an educational website tailored for people with ADHD. It’s going to be gamified in a way that makes learning easier for people who have a learning disability. I was thinking I might apply for a government grant too just for some extra cash if I qualify. Tech seems ageist to me, but only because my coworkers have always been older than me.
I’ll check out those links you sent me. I’m mostly fine, just dealing with RSD from ADHD. It’s all in my head though. I’m trying to get over it with exercise, but I may have just gotten the push I need to really make a change. Those are just statistics, and I don’t feel like they apply to me. I’ve had plenty of counseling and training, and I know myself very well. I’m in a really good place mentally despite the hardships. Doesn’t mean I don’t struggle sometimes. I’m just lonely, not suicidal, ya know? Thanks for the concern, though.
And I’m not old yet =) You be well too
I love embracing change, but there are some things I still find challenging, particularly when it comes to forming close relationships. A lot of how I react and behave today is shaped by my early experiences. Growing up, ADHD wasn’t well understood, leading to harsh and toxic reactions from my own family. Facing constant verbal and sometimes physical abuse meant I had to learn how to defend myself from a very young age. This environment forced me to develop a quick, strong response to conflict—a mechanism that’s become a part of how I assert myself today. Even though I’ve grown a lot and tried to adopt healthier ways to handle stress, my defiant nature can still emerge when I’m under pressure. This often leads me to push people away before they can get too close, as a way to protect myself from potential hurt or betrayal.
Recognizing and working through this is a big part of my journey towards healing. I’m trying to understand these behaviors and, hopefully, change them for the better. However, it’s been a struggle to shake the feeling that I might not be capable of being truly loved, given how ingrained these defensive responses have become. My journey through life has been marked by significant challenges that have both shaped and tested me:
As a child, I faced severe misunderstandings about my ADHD. This chaotic environment, marked by multiple interventions by Child Protective Services (CPS), taught me to be fiercely independent and self-reliant. These qualities, while helping me navigate many of life’s challenges, have also made it difficult for me to form close personal relationships.
Due to these experiences, I find it challenging to follow instructions or requests without fully understanding the reasons behind them. This need for clarity and purpose is deeply rooted in my early years, where confusion and lack of understanding led to significant consequences. If I don’t see the logic or purpose behind an action, my immediate response is to question or resist it, a defense mechanism developed to protect myself from the unpredictability I faced during my formative years.
During my teen years, I faced continual challenges with acceptance both at home and at school, which eventually led to legal issues and incarceration. However, my release from detention became a pivotal moment for me. I met mentors who guided me toward a more positive direction, ultimately inspiring me to enlist in the Army.
My early to mid-20s brought some stability through the structured environment of military life. It was also during this period that I began sharing my life with a partner, learning about balance and mutual support in a relationship. While I had no problem getting close to others, my challenge often came in the form of defiance, a trait deeply rooted in my need to assert independence and protect myself from past vulnerabilities.
As I transitioned into my mid to late 20s, I moved into civilian life and pursued my passion for technology. This phase was crucial in building my self-esteem, as I found success and fulfillment in my career. However, my personal life sometimes struggled to keep pace due to my guarded nature, which often made me hesitant to fully open up in relationships.
My early to mid-30s marked a period of career advancement and significant life changes, including a major move supported by a new job. This time allowed me to establish myself professionally, but it also brought personal challenges. The death of my father and the impacts of the pandemic were profound, testing my emotional resilience and forcing me to confront and manage new waves of grief and stress.
Recently, I’ve dealt with professional burnout and personal loss, prompting a move back to St. Louis for a period of reassessment and new beginnings. This has given me a chance to reflect on my life and the patterns that have defined my relationships. Each chapter of my life has taught me about resilience, adaptation, and the importance of staying true to oneself. My life hasn’t been easy, but these experiences have shaped me into a more resilient and empathetic person. I’m still learning to navigate the complexities of love and intimacy, hoping to one day fully believe that I am worthy of being loved just as deeply as anyone else.
I started going to therapy, but then I lost my job. I’m planning to go back ASAP.
Oh, I always thought it was open source for some reason.
Not every site will accept your Proton address. You could generate a unique email mask for most sites and apps instead of giving them your real email address, wherever your inbox may be. Firefox Relay just forwards the emails it receives to whatever address you give it.
If your goal is to avoid reverse email searches, this is how’d I’d avoid giving my real email address out during signups.
Edit: I think Google won’t accept a proton address, but I may be wrong
To answer your first question, I think switching to Proton is still worth it, even if you use Gmail for some things. I use Firefox Relay between my Gmail and Proton accounts. Generating a new email mask for every site/app has been no problem, except for a few sites like GitHub, Twitch, and Discord.
CrossCode is really good, but it isn’t free. I need to look through my Steam library to see which other games might be open source too. This is the only one I’m aware of, really. ProtonDB might have a list of games that are open source. It’s a great resource for checking compatibility if you’re playing on Linux.
It’s not as big of an issue as it might seem. While you might hear about it online, I’ve never encountered someone who genuinely fixates on height in person.
This could be a form of avoidance. Sometimes, people might lie or exaggerate to steer clear of conflict, rejection, or negative judgment. This behavior is particularly common among those who’ve experienced trauma and become hyper-vigilant about how others perceive them. Past negative experiences might have created a narrative where you felt undesired or unloved, leading to concerns about things like height, even though that might not be the true source of the problem.
If it’s a common thing, maybe talk to a professional, but one-offs are fine. Don’t carry someone else’s baggage.
Edit:
In relationships and social interactions, such tendencies might arise as a way to control the narrative and feel safer in interpersonal dynamics.
Oh ok, we’re talking about two very different things then. That’s a very strong opinion for a simple question. I understand what you mean a little better now. Docker is better, but Windows has some weirdness going on with Docker Desktop last time I tried using it. WSL + Docker might be even better to avoid the VM stuff altogether
If they’re a beginner, what better way is there to learn? My home lab and their Windows laptop running VirtualBox are two different things. The topic of security is too deep to cover now, but if they don’t open it up to the world, there shouldn’t be much risk. Local access only should be safe enough, and they might try a dozen different services before settling on one—or none at all.
Edit: Sysadmin is boring, I need to create. DevOps or some other automation role would be perfect IMO
Regarding your third point, you might find it helpful to search for beginners’ guides whenever starting a new project. One thing that people don’t seem to tell new users about is the struggles they faced when getting started themselves. Countless thousands of hours could be spent on this before someone decides to get started, while others pick it up in a much shorter timeframe. It just depends on you and what you are looking to get out of it.
It’s much more difficult than many people realize. If you need a space to test things out, I’d recommend installing VirtualBox with a couple of VMs to host whatever services you decide on. You can take a snapshot of the VM at any point in time, so when things go bad, you can simply restore whichever snapshot you like.
For your first point: Work experience, to save money, and just because it’s cool.
There are other benefits that I’ll mention depending on whether I think the person I’m talking to might value them or not, but these are my reasons.
My life got immensely easier when I figured out I did not need any features ZFS brought to the table, and I did not need any of the features K8s brought to the table, and that less is absolutely more.
Same here. Sometimes I get carried away, but overall, a very basic setup is more than fine. Nearly all of my devices run Ubuntu/Debian, and only the work-related stuff gets over-engineered.
It’s helpful for me to have something like a home lab where I can get hands-on experience with many different technologies. I’ve worn many hats, from developer to sysadmin, so a certain segment of my network tends to be built like Fort Knox. However, overall, 90% of my installs are minimalist with common best practices applied.
Media server: Jellyfin, qBittorrent, Radarr/Sonarr/Lidarr/Prowlarr, and OpenVPN/Traefik/WireGuard
Misc: PiHole, Vaultwarden, HashiCorp Vault, and FreeIPA
VMware ESXi for the VMs, but I’ll be switching to Proxmox soon.
All running in Docker or Podman containers on their own VMs. I’m trying to automate the deployment and configuration of each of these services via pipelines in GitLab CI using Ansible and Terraform right now. I also have a couple of Kubernetes clusters for testing and dev stuff on this server.
Accessed via SSH or an NGINX reverse proxy. I’m using certificates where possible, but a lot of the traffic between VMs is still unencrypted. I’ll eventually force everything local to use Traefik, but for now, only a few services are using it.
There are a lot of projects on awesome-selfhosted and selfhosted that I’ve been meaning to get around to installing. Home Assistant and AdGuard Home are two of them.
OpenStack has a really good Ansible hardening project for securing servers that I try to always use. I also have a Red Hat developer license, so I try to use their OS when possible because of their FIPS and other security profiles. Some services just don’t work with any of the newer RHEL versions though, and I usually fall back to CentOS Stream or Ubuntu whenever that happens.
The “bot” suggested I use RandomSleep. It’s not effortless.
I got the idea to use systemd timers from another answer in this thread and thought I’d help you out with an Ansible playbook.
In any case, I learned at least two things while reading the other replies, so it wasn’t a total waste. (and you got your answer)
What sucks is the attitude you get when trying to help in many Linux communities. It’s a tool, and a very useful one too.
If you knew what you were doing, you could understand the loop just by looking at it, without having to run it, ngl.
I didn’t run it, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there was an invalid option in it somewhere. Ansible Lightspeed would be a better tool than what I used, but it’s sufficient to get the point across.
Hey, I get that writing in your dog might seem funny, but this election is way too important for that. If people don’t take voting seriously, it increases the chances of someone like Trump winning again in 2024. And with things like Project 2025 on the horizon, which aims to reshape the government in ways that could really hurt a lot of people, every vote really does count. We need to stick together and vote wisely if we want to avoid some serious consequences.